Sunny With A Chance of 2013 Review!

Hello dear Chickens! It's getting to be the very  end of the year and I've been reflecting on this crazy whirlwind that was 2013. So here is my 2013 in Review:

January: We left MI after visiting our families on New Year's day. I got approved for my back surgery on Jan. 4th (which was HUGE). Colonel turned 3 on 1/14 (I can't believe he's almost 4, WHAT?!). We went to Las Vegas to visit our pals at Dog is God in Reverse before they moved to Alaska and had a mini 10 year reunion with her and our pal Trevor (Chemics!). Watched the SAG awards and loved them as always. Fell in love with Kid President and his amazing motivational talks. I went to The Ellen Show, ended there was no room for us, sigh.

February: I walked a Color Run 5k with my Second City peeps and it was AMAZING. I want to do another one. I met Keith Coogan with my pal Heather (who had the BIGGEST childhood crush on him ever), he's SUPER nice! The Shakespeare nerd that I am got super excited about Richard III being found. I got sick, boo! My surgery got moved back (boo) but only by a day (phew). The webseries 2 Hopeful Spinsters I was an actor in and did wardrobe for premiered with a season opener starring my pals and Michael Madsen! Joe and I celebrated SEVEN years together on 2/12/13. Colonel Mustard broke his ankle on that same day and I bawled my eyes out, I do not do well when my buddies are hurt. He then got a cast that he wore for quite a few weeks to heal, he also chewed himself out of those casts multiple times. I finished Conservatory 4 at The Second City Hollywood Training Center and had to take a break from moving on to Con 5 and graduating as I needed spinal surgery. I found out I had an enlarged thyroid and had to deal with that crap. I had an allergic reaction to amoxicillin and found out that I should never take that (or any penicillin) again so I don't die. I got a bit down and freaked out here.

March: I had a last hurrah before surgery and got to spend the night laughing with good pals who wished me well before surgery. I felt a mixed bag of emotions before surgery here and honestly felt like I was facing my own mortality. March 5th at 5am I went in to surgery. This day changed my life. I was so scared, Joe and I said goodbye just in case, I crawled naked onto a freezing surgery table, I woke up in bed with a huge scar down my front to Joe's face and beautiful flowers and well wishes from family and friends who are like family. I was fixed after 10 years of broken. It was a hard week in the hospital, really hard, but I started to heal. I went home on 3/9 and lived on pain meds for a bit. I got thrush from being in the hospital and cleared it up by oil pulling with coconut oil. My mom came out from MI to take care of me for a week and it was a great week of being super spoiled. Then Joe had spring break and took care of me for another week. Then my pal Benny came out from NYC (on tour with Beauty & the Best) and took care of me for 2 weeks. I was quite spoiled whilst healing up. I got a sweet handicap parking pass which really helped me a lot. We got our wedding photos back, they were gorgeous! I had a lovely Easter with pals and got to spend the day outside, even though I got a sunburn.

April: April is Autism Awareness month and it is very dear to me as my cousin has Autism. We celebrated Zebbie's 1 Year Gotcha Day, cannot believe how fast that flew and how it seems like we've had him forever. We celebrated the birth of Gwendolyn Everlast a.k.a. our pal Natalie. We also went down to San Diego and spent a weekend with our pal K Mac-Bakes. The Boston City Marathon bombing happened which broke my heart. Texas quake happened which also broke my heart. I bought Betty Goes Vegan and my stomach rejoiced. I saw End of the Rainbow starring Tracie Bennett and it was magic. Got a much needed tax refund-huzzah! We lost my cousin Ronnie which was really hard. Loads of states passed Gay Marriage Equality bills and I rejoiced.

May: We had a movie theatre premiere, red carpet and all, of 2 Hopeful Spinsters and it was AMAZING. Stars were there, Joe & I dressed up, it was our first big night out after my surgery. We celebrated our 4th Annual Vegan Beer Fest and it was MAGIC. I actually got in to The Ellen Show and it was awesome. I watched a lot of 90s Nickelodeon shows. Joe and I went to France and it was wonderful. I got super sick in Paris which was NOT wonderful. Turned out what we thought was food poisoning was our son, we panicked then rejoiced once my surgeon okayed us. Then we kept our secret until we were through the first trimester.

June: I was nauseated all month-ugh first trimester was ROUGH. Esther Williams died and my heart broke. Celebrated K Mac-Bakes bday, mys sister's bday, my Tacquito's graduation, struggled through the anniversary of my cousin's death, Father's Day, my pal Bridgey's bday, and Emily's bday. Laughed my butt off at BRF Syndrome. James Gandolfini passed away and my heart broke. Joe and I drove to Michigan (of course our car Rosalita broke down and had to be fixed but it was Firestone's fault). We had a wonderful time at home and I got to snuggle my nephew extra hard. We celebrated the retirement of my high school theatre's dream team.

July: We were still in Michigan for the start of July. Loads more cuddles with my little nephew. Mini reunion with some grade school chums that was pretty awesome. We picked our anniversary/reception spot. I met up with my pal that I had known since I was a little kid and hadn't seen in thirteen years & met her kiddos. We brought back my parents VCR & my childhood VHS collection. It was amazing. Zimmerman got away with murder and I felt sick in my soul. I fell in love with West Wing & Orange is the New Black. Dennis Farina passed away and I was heart broken. We announced our pregnancy publicly. The family I now babysit for and have known since college moved to L.A. I started swimming after a year long hiatus and it felt amazing. Signed up for my Conservatory 5 audition for Second City. Eileen Brennan passed away and my heart was sad.

August: Minnesota and Rhode Island joined those states who gave equal marriage rights to the LGBTQ community and my heart was happy. We found out that I am a carrier for Fragile X and my world came crashing down. I had an amniocentesis to determine if our baby would be born with disabilities, be a carrier like me, or be "normal". Those few weeks before the amnio and after were hell. The results came in here and I felt lost still. There were still so many decisions to make. Our car got towed and we shelled out $300+ for it, blerg! My first pregnant lady brain moment happened when I locked myself out of my locker with clothes and had to wander the gym in a bathing suit looking for Joe. We revealed we were having a baby boy here. The 2 Hopeful Spinsters webseries was apart of the Hollyshorts film festival. I felt the baby move for the first time on 8/23, that was crazy! News of Syria made my heart explode with sadness. I was accepted into the final level of Conservatory at Second City. My pal Monica visited and I got to see the Disney Animation Studios and my brain and heart were so happy I almost died.

September: We celebrated Labor Day with the rascals of Second City Hollywood and it was amazing. I hung with pals and watched Sharknado-it was crappy awesome. I bought my son his coming home outfit (it's this with Bill in blue). Joanna Garcia crushed my dreams of being Ariel on Once Upon A Time so now I hold out hope to be Merida (I have the hair). I let everyone know that being pregnant can be gross here. I wrote a letter to my son here and it's become my favorite post ever and I will give this to him when he is older. I went to my first Dodgers game and wore Tigers stuff cuz I love Detroit for life! My 2 pups were attacked by 2 other dogs and I almost beat the crap out of the dogs' owner for being useless and letting her dogs bite mine and not stopping them or getting them on their stupid leashes. I hate that lady. I graduated up to maternity swimsuits as my bump could no longer be tamed. I got the dreaded pregnancy cold that wouldn't die.

October: We were reunited with our college pal LaFawnduh and received an adorable baby gift from her. Joe and I went to Michigan to celebrate our one year anniversary of marriage. We had a blast and got to soak in some real fall weather, see lots of loved ones, make and eat delicious food, and party it up with pals and loved ones. See the pics here! We got held up in Chicago but made it back to L.A. after a lot of lameness. I hit the cankle phase of pregnancy where my ankles and calves swelled together to form one. My Tigers were kicking ass and taking names. My son received so much swag from all those who love us. Jimmy Leyland announced his retirement and I wept as he will always be my favorite crotchety Tiger. I finished my baby registry on amazon.com (find that right here). Marcia Wallace passed away and my childhood wept. We started our Prepared Childbirth Classes and loved our instructor. Lou Reed passed away, sadness again. I failed my first gestational diabetes test but passed the awful 3 hour one and then almost passed out. Joe and I went as hipster Ariel & Eric for Halloween with the kiddos I babysit and their folks, it was a blast!

November: The mentoring program for kids in less funded schools for writing put on their big show and I was so proud to be apart of it and of those kids' hard and amazing work! It was so special. :) The LAX shooting happened and I got so damn fed up with all the gun violence happening. My Spartans KILLED the Wolverwieners in football and my heart rejoiced. Spartan nation baby! My phone took a big crap and I have been struggling with it since as I can't upgrade until March. Same sex marriage became recognized in Illinois and my heart was happy. We received an amazing gifts of stroller/carseat combo from our pals Lizz & Sherm. I made a list of things to remember here. We hung out with our pals Bridget (came from NYC), Lizz & Sherm (came from San Fran), and Katie (here in L.A.) and it was epic. My son was measuring 4lbs. 6oz. already-BIG dude. My Pops and brother had birthdays and I was sad to miss them. My cousin Kate visited from Chicago and it was awesome. We found a crib we liked! Spartans continued to dominate in football. USC cut off dependent insurance screwing me and baby boy over big time and the hunt for new insurance began. We celebrated Friendsgiving with old pals and new & the kiddos I babysit for and it was a feast of food and good times. We got a storage unit to make way for baby stuff. I did a photo shoot with my cast for the opening of our show in January (check us out here on Facebook or on Twitter or on Instagram).

December: I turned 29 on December 1st and had my baby shower and it was an amazing day. I received an out-pouring of love from friends and family near and far and felt so special. I couldn't have asked for more. We decorated our apartment with our tree, stockings, wreath, etc. and I got into the holiday spirit. Joe turned 31 and I spoiled him rotten and he loved it. My grandma had a mini stroke and I didn't really talk about it to anyone publicly but it's been hard and my brother and my aunt have been keeping me in the loop and I am so grateful to them for all the help they're giving to her and my grandpa. She is now doing better and I am very grateful. I promoted the crap out of my show opening in January and continue to do so, have you visited the pages and liked us yet? You should, it would mean a lot to me. I wrote, produced, and am starring in this sucker. Please show your support! Nelson Mandela died and my soul broke, Madiba means so much to the world and to me. He is an inspiration for all. Paul Walker passed away and my 12 year old self wept. I was apart of this video parodying the Guinness commercial. I performed a lot of shows with my cast-mates of Me, My Selfie, and I (January 6th we open ay 7pm). I met Lily Tomlin and JoAnn Worley both of whom I love and did bits with me about my giant belly and son. The Spartans became Big 10 champs and are going to the Rose Bowl!!! We decorated the tree at our L.A. family's home and were once again awarded the best light crew award. We made a vegan french onion chip dip and my tummy did a happy dance. Second City had its holiday party and I saw so many of the people I love there and got to perform at Gradfest. I hit 9 months pregnant and my son is huge and just dropped causing my hips and pelvis to feel like they're breaking. My Zebbie pup turned 2! My nephew turned 1! We hosted an orphan Xmas and it was awesome and my cousin came down from Beale airforce base and we got to spend time with him and his wife and it was magic. Last night Joe and I went on our last big Date Night as just a couple with fur-babies. We went to Shojin vegan sushi and The Hunger Games Catching Fire. It was so lovely and a nice last big date together before little man arrives. Sometimes it's just nice to date your husband. Now we prep for tomorrow where we get to meet Coach Mark D'Antonio and Coach Tom Izzo-WHAT?!!! So excited!!!! Best Xmas present ever if I do say so myself. Then we spend a low-key New Year's Eve together.

So all in all 2013 was crazy. Major lows but some pretty great highs too.

And for 2014 here is my plan instead of resolutions:
Before Midnight On New Year's Eve: Write down the things you are DONE with in your life on a piece of paper and BURN IT. THEN: write all you want, desire, wish, dream of on another piece of paper. fold it and seal it in an envelope marked "TO BE OPENED NEW YEAR'S EVE 2014". Put it someplace that you'll remember...sock drawer, your Memory Box, diary, etc...When you open it next year, you'll be astonished at how many of those things came true! Happy New Year 2014!

I think this is a much better plan for me than setting resolutions that I forget about. Plus how fun will it be to read that list next year on New Year's Eve. As the year draws to a close I hope you all have a lovely New Year celebrations and that your 2014 is full of love, laughter, fun, and all the good things!

Take care dear Chickens & see you in 2014! :)

 

Sunny With A Chance of Read This!

This woman, seriously, just read this.

For real, just read that.


 

So here's the deal...

I am split right now. Super happy & excited on one side, the other side is super pissed off. I can't really put it better than that but I will explain what's going on.

So the pissed side because bad news out of the way leaves time for celebrating the good news right? Well, I am super pissed off at medical billing. For multiple reasons. The first being how am I charged $97,000 for my extensive, 2 surgeons necessary spine surgery and then $200,000 for ROOM AND BOARD? How is Room & Board more than my amazingly crazy procedure to go through the stomach to get to the spine and puts your guts on the table next to you? How is a place to sleep, watch tv, shower, and pee MORE expensive than a surgery with 2 surgeons using high tech expensive equipment slicing open my entire body taking loads of things out and putting them all together and not killing or paralyzing me? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? Please explain to me how the mark up on my Room & Board could be more than my surgery. I AM PISSED.

I am also pissed because the facility that I paid $3,000 a pop for epidural shots alone (just the physical shot) last year sent a bill I didn't even know about to collection's. Then I had to deal with a debt collector who didn't believe me, call 4 different billing offices for the hospital the pain center is through before I got the right one where the bill was generated from, and spend an hour on the phone arguing about how my computer statement didn't have these charges on them when I just paid it in full (that's right the entirety of the account) back in April. Why weren't these fucking charges there? Why wasn't I sent any notification about this bill being sent to a debt collector? The answer: it's my fault and that they don't have to send a notification out. ARE YOU SERIOUS? ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?

I cannot take the medical industry's billing anymore. YOU ARE A SCAM. YOU ARE OVER PRICING EVERYTHING AND SCAMMING PEOPLE. I WILL NOT BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE YOU PIECES OF SHIT. I am so pissed off. I hate CAPS but I feel like that's how I'm talking when I talk about all this stuff, in CAPS, so obviously you need to see them too. I am so beyond frustrated about how this is okay. How is it that at 28 years old this is the type of shit that my day to day is filled with? I AM ANGRY.

I am really, really, really, really angry. Really fucking pissed off. FUCK! I call major shenanigans on the whole billing portion of the industry. GO FUCK YOURSELVES. I love my neurosurgeon-he is amazing. I love my new internist-he is amazing. I love my ob/gyn-she is amazing. I like (so far) the specialist I'm seeing for thyroid "cystic nodules" that were found. Oh yeah I didn't tell you about that. That'll come next. I love (or like) all of those doctors. They care about ME. They care about MY HEALTH. They don't (seem to) care about my money. I'm sure they love being paid and they deserve to be but when I see them that is not what we ever talk about unless it's to help me out since I am fucking broke. But the Billing Industry of the Medical Industry. YOU ARE A JOKE. Quit making up numbers to make a 400% profit on something. If a test costs $100 don't charge $3,000! Don't believe this is happening? Read this Times article about how we're all being scammed and nobody is doing anything about it. GAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! I just can't-I am so pissed off.

The other reason I'm pissed is another piece of my body seems to be failing. I have 2 nodules that were found on my thyroid. The ultrasound reading said they were cystic, the specialist I am seeing doesn't think they are as they're hard as marbles not rubbery feeling like cysts. So I did more blood work and I did a thyroid uptake and scan [that's where you swallow radioactive iodine to see what's going on in the thyroid and how it is processing the iodine]. The uptake and scan will hopefully show if these nodules are hot or cold [hot means they're working and the thyroid is overactive, cold means they're dead spots on the thyroid and it's underactive]. The blood work will show if the thyroid secretions are off and if my brain is producing an antibody that is attacking my thyroid [this is apparently pretty common with people who have family histories of thyroid problems which I, of course, do]. The good stuff is thyroids are easy to manage, even if they need to be removed completely. The bad news is the thyroid hormones can really mess up your body. Good news the nodes could be nothing, bad news they could be cysts or worse tumors. And I feel like "Great, another piece of my body that doesn't work". I was trying to keep this close to my chest and not really talk about it until I have more answers from these new tests but I am so SICK of my body breaking down. I know this is something I have to live with for forever with my back, I've come to terms with the chronic pain, the chronic degeneration of my discs, the fact that eventually I might have to have every single disc in my spine fused or replaced-FINE. I GET THAT. But now another thing. More medical bills (which I just explained how much I love [insert sarcastic Liz Lemon style eye roll here]). I AM DONE-STOP IT BODY! Quit breaking. I want to travel, have kids, be an actor who can do physical movements of any kind, finish my Second City Conservatory program, etc. KNOCK IT OFF DAMN IT. Ugh. I am pissed off. At a lot of things that are all medical. I hope I turn into the She-Hulk from the radioactive iodine and then I can She-Hulk smash all medical billing offices as a big fuck you. That would make me happy.

Medical Issues = JERKWADS.

Now the other side. The happy excited side. Joe and I get to go to France next week. To Dijon and to Paris. He has a math conference [all paid for by the university] in Dijon next Tuesday through Friday morning. Then we decided to stay until Tuesday in Paris to have some fun. Because after all the shit you read before this-WE DESERVE IT. I feel like I DESERVE IT. So we are going to site see, eat delicious French vegan food, enjoy a vacation where we don't have to do anything or be anywhere for anyone else but ourselves, and enjoy France. I am so excited. I haven't been back since my trip to Paris, Normandie, & Brittany in high school and I cannot wait to rediscover Paris and to discover for the first time Dijon. We are taking the TGV which I haven't done before so I'm excited to ride a train in France and I'm excited for Joe to see my Paris. I love my Paris, I'm so happy to rekindle our love affair. I didn't have a single unpleasant experience there [save one rude baguette stand gal and even she couldn't bring me down]. I love you Paris and I'm a comin'. I think my wanderlust will be revved back up and satiated a teensy bit too. I cannot wait! J'aime Paris!

Hope you dear chickens are well. I will try to keep you updated from France. Thanks for suffering my rants  to get to the good news. :D



 

Partly Sunny With a Chance of Recovery

So surgery. Here is how it went. It is pretty unfiltered. It's really hard to talk about so it might seem a bit cold at some points but I tried to be accurate. Also, as it is unfiltered there is medical stuff (including poop and catheters) as well as cursing. There, you've been warned.

I couldn't sleep the night of the 4th. I was up just scared and stressed, watching Frasier on Netflix, screwing around on Facebook. My little sister called me at 3:45AM my time, 6:45AM her time while she was up with my nephew for a feeding. We chatted a bit, said I love you. I tried to get some sleep. I got about max 40 minutes before my alarm went off to be at the hospital at 5AM. I shook my husband awake. Threw on the clothes I had set out for myself when I had packed my hospital bag the night before. Brushed my teeth. Waited for him to finish taking our 2 pups out. Snuggled the crap out of our dogs and kissed them. Grabbed my stuff and we drove the 5 minute drive to hospital.

Joe dropped me off to sign in and register whilst he parked the car. I was the first person to sign in. Joe came in about halfway through the process of paperwork and paying $500+ for 2 days they expected me to be in the hospital. I got copies of all paperwork I signed (please if you're ever ill or hurt make sure you get a copy of EVERYTHING you sign, I mean it, keep them on file for yourself-trust someone who has been doing this for a decade). We went out to the waiting room. There was a guy my age or younger there with his father and his girlfriend. He told me he was having shoulder surgery. We chatted for a minute or two and they called him in to sign-in and register. Joe and I waited. The 3 of them came back out after he signed in. All 5 of us waited.

A nurse came and led me down to the surgery prep room. I changed into my gown and hair & feet covers. I peed in a cup to prove I wasn't pregnant for them. I got into the gurney and had blood drawn, an IV set up, nurses checked my blood pressure and my stats and logged them. Joe got to come in to be with me. Two young gals introduced themselves to us and told me they worked for some company and would be monitoring my movements of something-I was a little distracted by my mounting fear. The anesthesiologist came in and introduced himself to us and began (in the most monotone voice ever) to go through the long laundry list of what could happen to me and how I could die, then he went through his part of the procedure and left. The lead nurse during surgery came and introduced herself to us. She assured my husband she would be in constant contact with him via his cell throughout my procedure. She checked a few vitals and left. During this time shoulder guy was wheeled in and prepped and hauled off. Joe and I both were white as sheets and afraid and pretending not to be. We tried to be up beat and joke around. They then wheeled me to the last prep room before surgery.

I was right across from surgery guy and his family. He looked panicked. I tried to smile and joke. A nurse came in to talk to them, his surgeon came, he said goodbye to his family and they wheeled him off. Joe and I were alone. I told him how much I loved him, how much he means to me, how scared I was. We held each other. He was scared and pretending to be fine. He told me he loved me. We went over the phone tree of who to call with updates. We laughed at the silly posters about hand washing in the room. My surgeon came in. Dr. Lanman looked over my stats and we chatted briefly. He went to go see what was taking so long. Joe and I held hands tightly. I started to cry but choked it back. Facing my mortality is NOT what I wanted to be doing at 28. I grabbed Joe and hugged him. The nurse came to wheel me in to the OR, I hugged and kissed Joe and told him I loved him, he said the same. I was wheeled across the hall to my OR.

As soon as we entered the Operating Room it was FREEZING! They asked me to slide across the gurney to the table. I slowly made my way onto the table set up and reclined as best I could. They immediately began to pull off my gown from around me to just on top of me and started putting my arms into foam holders so I was lying in a T set up. The anesthesiologist began to hook me up to my drugs whilst the head nurse packed warm blankets over me to keep me from shivering. The 2 monitoring gals arrived and started hooking up electrodes to me feet and legs. The anesthesiologist told me he was going to start my drugs and I floated off into my oblivion scared and panicked but forcing myself to think positively.

The surgery was about 2.5 hours Joe tells me. A little less maybe. He said the nurse called him and updated him and he called the VIPs on the phone tree [my folks and siblings] with the intermittent news and everyone when surgery was complete. I don't remember the recovery room. I don't remember being put into my hospital room. Apparently it took quite some time to find me a space. None of that is anywhere in my memories. I remember being in my room. Having Joe there. Feeling sore and bloated in my stomach, knowing there were drugs, having the nurse tell me I was on a drip and had a catheter in and to just rest. I felt fuzzy but safe and felt relieved to find my Joey there beside me. Things began to clear up as the afternoon/evening wore on. I talked to Joe, kept lifting my catheter fascinated to see constant fluids from my IV draining out of me (and it wasn't pee-so weird when you're on drugs), adjusted to bed to feel more comfortable, drank loads of fluids (water, broth, juice, more water), sucked air from a plastic device to try to get rid of anesthesia pockets in my lungs. I met all 3 nurses who were taking care of me that night (and thank goodness they wrote their names down on that dry erase board because I was all drugged up gal). I was woken up multiple times in the night to ask about my pain levels and to empty my catheter, apparently I was a champ with my fluids and my poor male nurse had to empty my bucket more than anyone.

The next day I got the dilaudid drip that I could release myself every 6 minutes. Boy did I love that bad boy. I was pushing that button all the damn time. I joked with the nurses I would divorce Joe and marry it if I could. They introduced me to the physical therapists, I was helped out of bed and walked the hallway. That's right, one day later I was walking. My catheter was removed because, again, I am the fluid champ. Joe and I watched t.v. and he worked on math. A few friends came to visit me. They were angels and helped me stay positive and made me laugh (but not too hard as I was really sore in my incision site). I made Joe take pictures of my incision site everyday to monitor the swelling and bruising. The first days were swollen, then the bruising came on, then I was distended from lack of bowel movements due to the drugs. I had multiple mishaps with the Cafeteria not understanding I was vegan and had to send lots of food back. I met with the Caf director person and she seemed to get it but my orders still got messed up all week. This was the only low spot to my hospital visit. I had amazing nurses looking out for me (I only disliked 1 of the whole group of 12 or so). I walked more and more everyday. I tried stairs towards the end of the week (Thursday, Friday, & Saturday), that is 3 days post op. I went on oral meds & milk of mag. I took a shower which felt like heaven, Joe assisted as I sat to take it. It was rough but we did it. More friends came by, some brought gifts, sent flowers, made me laugh, they were all lovely. My room had so many flowers it was beautiful. Joe slept over every night with me from Tuesday on through. He left only for an hour or so at a time to take care of our pups. By Friday the nurses told me if I didn't have a BM they would do an enema. I managed a small one that night but agreed in the morning to just go for it. It was a ridiculous and uncomfortable experience that I cracked jokes about the entire time. My nurse was a sweetie about it and told me about her own post C-section. After a morning of being in the bathroom and a shower I was released to go home at about 1PM.

They wheeled me down to the front door. That elevator ride was painful. Getting into fresh air felt amazing though. Getting into the car was awful, the ride home felt like torture. When I stepped up the 6 steps of our apartment building it was slow and tough. Walking in to our apartment Joe held the pups back from jumping on me, he put their leashes on and we went to the bedroom where they got on the bed and I pet them without bending, once they had calmed down after having not seen me for a week we took the leashes off. I got into bed and called the CVS pharmacy I use and asked about my prescriptions being filled and my husband picking them up. We called our pal to come sit with me whilst Joe went to the pharmacy. Poor guy sat with me for 3 hours whilst Joe was stuck at CVS. I fell asleep a little. Joe came home. He had bought a chair for the shower for me. The hospital had given us a raised toilet seat. I know had a slew of pain meds & stool softener. I kept taking photos of the incision site for myself to look at my progress. Joe and I tandem showered every other day. I walked around the block.

My mom flew in that Sunday to help during that next week so Joe could go back to school. She & I walked around the block 3 times a day with the pups. She helped clean, bought us groceries, did laundry, vacuumed, watched The Waltons with me, took Joe and I shopping for clothes & apartment items & all the rest of the series (seasons 2-film specials) of The Waltons, and just helped. It was nice to be taken care of so well. You have no idea how much it was needed for me but also for Joe. I think he needed to be spoiled and needed a break and that is exactly what my mom did by being here.

The next week my dear friend Benny came all the way from NYC on tour with Beauty and the Beast to stay with us. Having him here was wonderful. I kept making progress and walking. We walked together quite a bit and laughed tons. Laughing may be the best thing for recovery. He stayed with us for 2 weeks and I miss him being here! It was so much fun to reconnect and laugh at stupid stuff and cry at great music videos and watch ridiculous movies from the 80s. Our school pal Kathy came up to see us from San Diego and that was amazing too. We all spent Easter together and it was the best treat the ol' Bunny could have brought. And we had an amazing brunch with another high school pal who lives out here and I got a wee sunburned at Miss Di's brunch. It was lovely. Not the burn but the company and food.

Now I am almost at 2 months post op and I have been cleared for light cardio (breast stroke swimming, elliptical, & stationary bike) so I am looking to join a gym with a great pool here in LA. I am using less pain meds, have gone back on my mutli-vitamin (for my vitamin D deficiency), and Joe and I are starting to get things together for our October Wedding Part 2 shindig. Life is starting to move forward and I am alive and well. I was fully fucking scared. But we did it. And those who are my true friends rose to the occasion, those who aren't didn't and I am sad about that but also glad to slough them out of my life. I need nothing but those who can handle the shit with me. This proved it. I was scared but I did it. Joe was scared but he did it with me. So did my family and my friends. I cannot wait to see how amazing life can be with less pain. Chronic pain is hell. And Degenerative Disc Disease will always plague me and so will my acute arthritis. But this part of the story is over and hopefully the thoracic and cervical parts of the story don't start for awhile because I am ready to get out there and kick some ass.

Joe and I may be going to France soon for a math conference. He is actually away right now on one in Oregon, it is my first weekend alone post surgery and I am feeling pretty good. I miss him but it feels nice to take care of myself again. I am in full wedding party mode. I made 3 wedding picture albums (professional, candids, and bachelorette party). I have a premiere coming up for the web series I helped on. I am planning on having an amazing honeymoon to Ireland and beyond. Joe and I are talking about loads of adventures coming up here and how we're so ready for them. And I feel so lucky to have this fighter in me that keeps going. Even through the almost decade of shit I have made it. And I will keep mucking through the medical debt and bullshit to get to the awesome. It has already started and I cannot wait to have more of it. I am so grateful to my surgeon, my nurses, the whole staff at Olympia Medical Center, my husband, my family, my friends, my community at Second City Hollywood. And damn it, I am thankful to my back, which has really showed me how thankful I am to be a fighter. Fuck you and thank you stupid failing spine. You're an asshole but you're my asshole.

Here is to all my adventures to be! Na zdrowie & slainte dear chickens!